Humor, Mommyhood

Pregnancy Woes

Disclaimer: My apologies that my blog has basically been overthrown by baby this and baby that. This is not necessarily becoming a mommy blog, but this pregnancy is definitely a focal point of my life these days, so it’s only right that I document everything. Enjoy these pregnancy woes!

With the end of pregnancy looming, life is getting rough. My feelings are all over the place, getting to work is becoming increasingly more difficult, and I’m just ready to meet this little girl. All of that being said, I’ve been battling some serious pregnancy woes that I just can’t keep in anymore. The best release is letting them all out for the world to hear. You know, all of my first world pregnancy problems. Going to put them on the table, feel free to judge me freely. I’m at the point where I have stopped caring.

Pregnancy Woe 1 | What’s a decent night of sleep? – Battling pregnancy insomnia…

IF ONE MORE PERSON TELLS ME TO GET SLEEP BEFORE BABY ARRIVES I AM GOING TO THROAT PUNCH THEM. Ok, not really – but they will definitely get the silent treatment and some serious side eye. You see at 37 weeks pregnant there really isn’t enough pillows in the world to make sleep comfortable. Also, when you have a 6-7 pound baby sitting on your bladder practically draining it all night long – don’t expect sleep. Pregnancy insomnia is real and I’m in the midst of it. Random moments at night require me to walk around to loosen up my hips, sit in the nursery in awe of how much life is about to change, and just beg this sweet kid of mine to just stop moving for maybe an hour.

If you’re wondering, everyone else is sleeping like champs in the house. Both dogs and the husband are getting the best shut eye.

Pregnancy Woe 2 | Is it possible to wear pull ups all day long? – True Life, I live in the bathroom.

Remember that baby on bladder practically draining it all night long, yeah that’s true. I have this intense fear of coughing, squeezing, or even relaxing my body too much in fear that I’m going to wet my pants. Bladder control is out of the door when you’re pregnant and from what I’ve heard afterwards as well. My waddle game to the nearest bathroom is strong and I don’t risk leaving any building without a visit.

We aren’t only buying diapers in this house, we’re buying pull ups for this momma!

Pregnancy Woe 3 | Where are my feet? – There’s a bowling ball in my shirt!

I officially cannot see my feet when standing. Isn’t this some kind of milestone for pregnant women? When I can see them, they are definitely not as narrow as they use to be. Luckily, I don’t have cankles but let’s be real we still have a few weeks left. Other than that, the bowling ball under my shirt is taking up a lot of space. I’ve FINALLY gained some spatial awareness and am no longer running into corners and doors belly first. At 37 weeks, I’ll take that as a win.

Pregnancy Woe 4 | Can I wear sweats to work? – Clothing should be optional at this point!

Since we’re on the topic of the bowling ball under my shirt, clothing is not fun anymore. Dresses were cute, but now I feel like I’m obligated to look have decent in them. Yeah, I would like to start practicing my tired mom life look. At what week in pregnancy is it appropriate to wear sweats to the office? Would anyone dare question a pregnant woman who just desire comfortable pants and slide on shoes? T-shirts and sweatpants have never sounded so fashion forward. This is valuable information that I need to know. Tell me all of your secret moms!

Pregnancy Woe 5 | When is your due date? – That’s just none of your business…

This one really bothers me only because I typically get this from clueless men or women who just don’t know me. All of my close family and friends who tell me that I’m all belly are lying or being nice to not hurt my feelings. Why does it matter when I’m due? Clearly, I’m waddling because I’m in pain from this kid sitting on my pelvis and the extra weight I’m lugging around. When I’m due shouldn’t matter to you because you’re not going to push this kid out. Do you have plan on showing up at my house to help with those late night feedings? What about the diaper changes? Yeah, didn’t think so.

Mind your business and know that I’m keeping a countdown for my own sanity – not yours.

Any pregnancy woes that you faced? Leave them in the comments!

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1 Comment

  • Reply Nan Walvoord

    LOVE!!!

    May 24, 2017 at 8:42 am
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