“Grief, a type of sadness that most often occurs when you have lost someone you love, is a sneaky thing, because it can disappear for a long time, and then pop back up when you least expect it.”
-Lemony Snicket, The Carnivorous Carnival
The pain was still raw and she could feel the tears welling up in her eyes. It didn’t help that each day that inched closer to when he passed away was riddled with constant reminders of the presence he had in her life. Each day it felt like someone was pricking her with a thousand needles, but his birthday was always the hardest.
She sat in the coffee shop listening to the low hum of the music and couldn’t hold back the tears. Correction, she WOULDN’T hold back the tears.
Isn’t she lovely
Isn’t she wonderful
Isn’t she precious
The salty droplets rolled gently down her face as she stared blankly without any fears of who would see her cry. After a year and a half of grief counseling, she had learned to accept the fact that there would be days when it would feel like a band-aid was ripped off too quickly. She quickly started practicing all of the coping strategies that she learned.
It was always soothing reminding herself of the most cherished moments they shared. The big hearty belly laughs he would get when anyone around him made a joke. His gentle, but strong hands embracing you in the most caring and loving hug that would set you at ease. The island dialect that would accompany his deep baritone voice whether he was giving you words of encouragement or singing a song.
She took a deep breath, gathered her belongings, and went to the exit to head home. As she felt the cool spring air graze the streaks on her face, she could almost hear his laugh. That was the moment she knew she would be ok.